Good Bye to the last 3 Years

I stand (type) before you as an emancipated woman in the 21st century. Today is the last day of my old life. My new life awaits me in Little Rock with my baby son! I AM SO EXCITED...

 YOU GUYS! All those years of tears, wonder, doubt, anger, resentment, and betrayal are gone. I let them go. I let go of that heavy load I've been carrying around for 3 years. Gone. It feels amazing! I'm sitting here with the most happy tears I have ever allowed myself to cry. I freed myself from my old self. It's a really neat concept when you think about it. Sometimes we become our own prisoners. I am getting MH ready to go see his dad. It's always a struggle for me to part from him for weeks at a time. It doesn't get easier. But last night, instead of being upset and sad about his departure, I did something different. I pulled out the old laptop and showed Max pictures of a past life. I'm really proud of myself for keeping some of those old memories because they weren't all bad. Max had a great time looking through old dating, engagement, and baby pictures. I can't believe how much he's grown. I can't believe how amazing he is. I can't believe we are moving forward with our lives and we are doing well. My love for him grows every day. I don't remember what my life without him was like. Honestly, I can't remember a lot of what happened from 2007-2010 haha. The hurt has faded away and all I am left with are these sweet memories. That must be the hand of God. My concept of religion and faith have changed and I like myself a lot more now. I know who I am. I know why I am here. I know where I am going and finally, I know that families can be together forever. I see my sweet, sweet man child and my heart melts. Greater joy I have never known. 

I want to encourage y'all to let go of heavy things. I want to remind y'all that life is so beautiful. Don't get stuck in ruts. Don't let bad experiences bring you down. I'd like to think I'm in a refining process. My challenges have helped me grow and although there are some I would never want to go through again, I have learned to simply live happy for the sake of happiness. Good bye 2007-2010! Hello future!

I love my Asixan child!

Max with his cute cousins Aaron and David. We love these boys!

Iphone kisses. Not as good as the real deal but I'll take them!